I noticed that it's never going to be the same feeling in every occasion. Our perspectives also change, what we were feeling before will not be the same feeling we have now. It doesn't mean that one thing is better than the other. It's the feeling that seems like it's controlling, but it's actually our view on things that creates those feelings. It's thinking about stuff that, may I say, is mostly out of our control, and thinking that it's possible to be felt or to happen again. It's not about bringing something back, it's knowing how to integrate such situations into the feeling we want to achieve.

Just Doing the Act

There are times where we want things to be in control all the time, without noticing our own actions. We would think, in every pause, are we doing too much? Too little? If you're doing things already thinking of the result, and not really focusing on what's in front of you and enjoying the moment, you might be feeling the latter.

I once helped someone do something, already thinking about the result, and caught myself asking, am I doing too much? It made me second-guess everything. I learned to not force things to happen, but to just enjoy the moment, and do things carefully and beautifully, without losing all the fun.

Quantity and Quality

Rating is a comparison of things, giving them a grade based on what felt more and what felt less than what we actually wanted to feel in that moment. With every rating, we're also building our quality, whether we realize it or not.

That quality might be something that already happened, something automatically out of our control now, and in some cases, it ends up shaping what's happening in the present too. Rating doesn't just ruin the things we're comparing, it ruins the present moment as well. It takes something that should've stayed a memory, something that was never meant to be pulled back and remembered, and uses it to ruin what's already been built in the moment we're actually in.

Quality shouldn't force us to control something that was never ours to control in the first place. It should be about knowing what's really worth keeping in the moment, and what's worth letting go.

It's worth taking a pause before rating something. Ask yourself whether this rating will actually help you move forward, or if it's just going to make your present feel worse than what it actually is?

.aletheia